tonydanza and fuckyeahhouserulez.
a temperamental fuck.
how fun does that sound?
Woken up at 9 by my little sister barging into my room. So happy that she’s there to truly annoy me every morning. I’m really going to miss her when she goes back to Nigeria yet again. I got all annoyed and stressed looking after her today, but at the same time, I loved every second of it, ‘cause she’s not around a lot.
Before Miss. M stormed in I had woken up a couple of times and snuggled into G. I love when I wake up and he’s there, all snore-y and usually dazed. It’s a nice feeling. I realise I’m more than very lucky.
This afternoon I banished myself to the garage to get on with unpacking my bags from Edinburgh and properly starting to sort out everything. Coats back on hangers, dresses pressed, and ceremoniously throwing out most of the clothing I hate, and is usually rubbish. It’s been quite therapeutic. Half 8 now and the agenda is to continue ironing and marvel at the fact I do own a few nice pieces. After that, my room is being attacked with black bags, and I am getting rid of all the rubbish, and everything shall get its rightful place. Tomorrow, the studying begins, truly. My desk has been planned down to a tee, and while that sounds extremely sad, it is necessary so I focus.
To keep myself from going crazy doing uni work, I’m putting my guitar at the side of my desk, and my art supplies close by, I’ve got a few ideas for a fashion collection based in pastels done in watercolours. Sounds poncy, but I think GaGa would love it. And it’ll stop me from total boredom. Oh, and in this fantasy haute-couture world, Daisy Lowe will be modelling, and GaGa will be in the front row. The whole affair would be godparented by Alexander McQueen and Vivienne Westwood. I love escaping into fashion! Oh, and I have to design a bag… Definately a simple one, because I’m going to make it!
These are my thoughts for the day x.
listening to a little ennio morricone at the reccommendation of the one i loveeee.
and now i’m listening to david gray, ‘the one i love’. whatta song.
no energy for proper punctuation, but that’s okay. just going to let my thoughts tumble before i get a few hours sleep and head back to another dire shift at a horrible medical conference. tomorrow, anyone who puts me down and gets on my nerves will get a huge smile, because it’s sad if they have to take out their aggressions on temp workers who are trying their very best for a pittance.
i’m packing up my uni things, i’m not sad first year is nearly over. no one’s really left in halls and i’m not sure if i’ve made those unforgettable uni friends that everyone raves about but everyone i’ve met so far has been lovely in their own special way & definately a flatmate i can’t wait to live with.
time to listen to some allie moss, i really think you should give her a listen, cutesy music to listen to.
i’m still constantly worried that i’m skint and that i can’t balance edinburgh and home, and that i might lose people i care about lots, and that i’m not perfect, but it’s fine, i’m too harsh on myself. I’m not bad, and I can’t control the past or the future, I can however decide on now and do my best at everything now. I think my problem is i’m constantly thinking about everything and when i trip up on one tiny area of life i fear the rest will come falling down too. I can’t think like that anymore, it’s not healthy. I’ll never be carefree, but I can just be.
for now, i have more to pack. i gotta get to sleep for 1, cause i’m up again at 7.
i’m going to look at tomorrow as an adventure, to make the day pass much faster (: